Getting Better

Cody and Amy came in the store this evening. To the deli, in fact, to get sandwich meat. And I didn't hide. Actually, I served them. I had a normal conversation with him. I can't say that didn't feel incredibly guilty, but I felt less so. Less than I have in a very long time. And it felt...good. And surprisingly, as he really initiated the conversation, it doesn't seem like he hates me. Which is odd, because he should. He should hate me a lot. But it doesn't seem like he does.

I still get a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach when I see him, and I don't think I will ever stop feeling guilty, but it's getting better. It's getting better.