I should update more often

I really am getting rather slacker-like. Oh Mare, look what uni has done to you.

Nine Lessons and Carols went well, I thought. My parents came, which was nice even if I didn't get to see them afterward. I was about ready to kill the photo guy though. Seriously, how many times do you need to test the flash before you're satisfied that it works? Honestly! Some people's children!

Yesturday was pretty routine other than the fact that I skipped stat to sleep. In fact, I came up to my room, dropped off my stuff (I was even still wearing my pyjamas), and went over to Mark's and crawled into bed with him (he didn't have class until 2 pm!!! Grrr.) until like, 12:30. It was delighful. And then I slacked off all afternoon and called my mother and then watched Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade with Mark. It was hott.

Oh, I was sleeping, minding my own business this morning, enjoying my sleeping, when I was rudely awakened by Mark shoving me off his shoulder and then him proceeding to roll over, taking ALL of the blankets with him, and then lying on top of them! The nerve of some people's children! I was freezing! And then, to add insult to injury, when I came back from the washroom, he had moved so he was taking up the entire bed! I was just not having that, so I poked him and told him to move over and give me covers because he was hogging them all. And he insists that he doesn't remember. lol. Psh. That's what I have to say!

My math teacher ended class 20 min early. It was creepy. And we had to do teacher evaluation. I felt really bad, but he's a terrible teacher. And I wasn't actually all that harsh on him. And we had guest speaker in Econ, so no notes HUZZAH!

Choir and dodgeball tonight. Rabe and I are making a sign for Mark to hold that will read "I want to have Adam's babies". That's right.

So Much Floorcest!

How much? SO MUCH! Seriously, 9H is floorcest central. Shall we see? Oh, let's:
Dan & Carol
Joel (facial hair) & Kaylyn
Arthur & Meaghan (sort of)
Jamie & Adam (newest couple!)
Wow, and I thought Mark's floor was bad because they have two couples. lol. Not that it's bad or anything. It's quite cute, really.

I was involved in a freak salt fight today. It was scarring. There I was, standing in the kitchen, making potato soup for lunch, when in comes Devin. I happened to have a bit of salt in my palm (way too much actually, but I'm inept at pouring), when Devin took the box from me, declared that there wasn't nearly enough salt in my soup, and proceeded to try and dump the enire box in. Naturally, I threw the salt I had in my hand at him and grabbed my soup away. He retaliated and escalated by throwing a full handfull of salt in my ear/hair/on my shoulder. Suffice to say I made my getaway whilest I could.

Choir went well.

And that has been a day in the Life of Mare.

The World of Mare

It's been a while since I've posted. Not as long as some *coughKalyncough*, but still, it deserves a whipping with a wet noodle.

So Tuesday night I did not, in fact, follow the plan. Suprise, suprise. I went to Becky's birthday dinner. And then came back. I totally don't remember what I did after that. Probably something involving Mark. In fact, we may have watched a movie. I really don't know.

Wednesday was uberly uncool. I got home, Mark and I watched Kill Bill Vol One (terrible, by the by), I went to choir, I came home,watched dodgeball (we lost, as per usual. hey who saw that coming?) and somehow didn't manage to start my homework until like, 11pm. And thus I was up until 3 on Mark's floor doing my math assignment. But hey, I pretty much finished it.

Needless to say, Thursday was not a good day for me. I don't think I even did any homework except for my spanish. Hardcore.

Last night was Floormal/Floor formal. It was okay. My first experience in a cab went well, I thought lol. Mark and I cabbed home after supper as we didn't want to go to Rapid Fire, and spent the evening/early morning hours on his floor until I was unceremoniously kicked out at 2am to go to bed as I had to be at Education South at 8 15am. Woot.

And Rabe was just getting back as I was reaching the elevator, so we talked for half an hour before going to sleep. Go 5.5 hours of sleep! Rabe and I somehow managed to roll out of bed this morning, collect Brad, and make it to EDU at the appointed time. And carpooled with a guy named Mike (driver) and some other random dude. With whom we are carpooling tomorrow.

Rehersal/practice was okay. I was just majorly tired. And it was really long. And I fell asleep in the pews during the handbell's rehersal. But hey, I enjoyed my nap. So far today, I have accomplished finishing my composition, my span text homework, and laundry. Woot.

Howevah, I should go back to my "homeworking". Yes. Yes I should. Choir tomorrow.

Frickin' Hell

I think that about sums up my present state. I am so tired, it's not even funny anymore. And I have so much homework, that I won't be sleeping for another few weeks. Until Christmas, probably. But that's okay. I can sleep over Christmas break.

The plan for today is: come home after stat, make/eat lunch, start english essay, decorate Becky's door for her birthday, spanish homework, stat reading, more english, start math. And somewhere in there I need to go borrow a dress from Becky and have supper. And sleep. But really, that's optional. Oh, and I have to have a shower as I was much too lazy to haul my ass out of bed when I was supposed to this morning. Yup, this was another stick-my-head-under-the-faucet morning. Sound like a good plan?

God this week is going to suck. And this weekend is going to suck because of choir. And December is going to suck because of exams. Seriously, someone kill me now.

So much time, so little sleep.

Being as I have a shitload of homework to do this weekend, I meant to get a head start last night on some of it. Yes, meant to. But hey, good intentions are all that matter, right?

We borrowed Butterfly Effect from Brede last night, and Rabe, Mark, and I watched it in my (and Rabe's) room. It was fantastic really, I just got scared in a lot of part. lol. After the movie (10:30-ish), I escorted Mark home and saw him to bed (really, as I'm the one that made him sick in the first place, the least I can do is try to take care of him), and then wandered out into his lounge.

See, I was expecting to be called by Andrea to sign some friends in after they got back from the bar (not that it happened), so I decided to stay up, thus I had time to kill. So, I watched a bunch of guys play three-man (a drinking game which is quite entertaining, let me know if you want to know the rules) for an hour.

After everyone was drunk and the game wrapped up, Brad and I borrowed the Bourne Identity from Mattie, and headed over to 9H to watch it (CJ was playing video games on their tv). But alas, our tv was in use when we got here, so we went back to Mac and checked every frickin lounge for a vacant and usable tv, and came up with nothing. So back to 9H, and we just waited for the movie everyone was watching to finish.

A bunch of people that went to the Kegger came in, so some of them elected to watch the movie with us (Melissa, Adam, Leanna, Joel, Book, and later Kaylynn). By the end of the movie, Joel and Kaylynn had gone to bed, and Melissa and Adam and Brad were asleep. Josh and Melissa got Adam to his bed, and Leanna woke up Melissa, and Book went home, and Josh and Dana came out to watch Return of the Jedi.

Whilest trying to figure out how to operate the damn tv, Brad woke up and I think he ended up catching most of the movie. I saw up to the part where they just finished kicking Jabba's ass, and then I fell asleep. Hey, it was like 4:30am, can you blame me?

I woke up when someone was talking to Dan this morning (and why he was in the lounge eating, I have no clue), and Brad decided to go home for a few hours of sleep. I think it was about 6:30 or so. Who knows? I just mumbled something to Brad and gave him his shoes and climbed onto one of the couches (I was sleeping on the floor up to this point). When I actually woke up this morning at like, 8am, Dana was sleeping in the trough, and some guy that had been sleeping there as well was getting up. So I decided it was time to get up.

No naps today as I have too much to do. Woot for 10 am choir and 3.5 hours of sleep!

Ouch.

Today was just full of painfullness. On my way out of the Dentistry/Pharmacy Building, I slipped and fell down the last three steps and wrenched my knee/hip, which was incredibly painful. Seriously, not only are those marble steps, but my leg definitely does not bend that way. And then I got hit in the face in dodgeball. Twice. Just ouch.

Mark has officially caught my flu. I enjoy sharing. Anyone else want some germs? I know where to send you. Because I no longer have the germs. Mare is no longer sick. Huzzah.

Mare out.

Because December is almost here...

I thought you might enjoy this bit of holiday fun I tripped over: Holiday Eating Tips . Seriously, you need to follow those tips!

Fuck.

That's right, FUCK. You know what, I'm tired of having to change myself for people. I'm done. This is who I am. DEAL. It's not like I TRY to be a bitch. I don't INTEND to be an ass. But whatever.

I'm sorry, I'll go rant on my private blog now. Y'all shouldn't have to deal with my issues.

Curses, foiled again!

So I went and got my flu shot yesturday, and guess what. I got sick. I've been up since 2am because I couldn't sleep and then was paying homage to the porcelain god for half an hour. Just ew. Needless to say, I didn't go to classes today. Instead, I've spent the morning alternating between sleeping and watching tv with Arthur and Meagan. And now I get to see if I can keep lunch down. Yay.

So basically, today has sucked. I wanted to go visit my grandma, but that's out of the question. Instead, I shall go take a shower. Everyone loves to be clean.

Sleep?

What sleep? I don't sleep! Sooo unfashionable. Oh god, I'm tired. This weekend was absolute crap, other than when I was at Mark's on Sat/Sun. On the way home, mum and dad and I stopped to visit grandma. We got there just in time to be part of the Annointing of the Sick. Father Jim came up from Wetaskawin just to see grandma. It was really...emotional. I just about started crying so many times. But I didn't. Because Wellers don't cry, remember? Except my daddy was tearing up pretty bad during the Annointing. It was...weird. I've never ever seen my daddy cry. It simply is not done.

I hadn't seen Father in ages, so it was kind of nice to see him again. Usually, I'm really awkward around priests, but not with Father Jim. He's too much like my daddy. They grew up together, in fact. He even gave me a hug on his way out.

You would think I would have been smart enought to get my homework done this weekend, but, true to form, I didn't. Well, not all of it. I left some math, english and stat until Sunday night, which coincidentally happened to be laundry night. Needless to say, I didn't get to bed until quite late. And didn't get my english or stat done. Whoo.

Got my flu shot today, so hopefully I shan't get sick. Hopefully.

The elevators aren't working again. *sigh*. I hate elevators.

More News

Grandma went in for surgery early this morning, but they weren't able to remove the tumor because it's too intertwined with the stomache and pancrease. Instead, they cut off some nerves so she wouldn't be in pain, and re-routed some things in the pancrease through the stomache, or some such. After she recovers from the surgery, they're hoping to start her on chemo (if she agrees) to see if it will help any, because they're not sure that it will. After that, if it helps, they may see about removing the tumor later.

It's all my mum's been talking about all day, and I'm getting tired of it. It just isn't the way things are done in my family, and she doesn't understand that. Her and Aunty Sandy feel the need to talk about it constantly. She's been on the phone all day telling everyone and repeating herself 20 times a conversation. It jsut...grates on me. I don't think my dad can handle it anymore either, because he snapped at her for it before supper. Which made her go off to her room crying. Which made my dad go down to talk to her and they got in a fight. Again. Funny thing, they pretty much only fight when I'm home. Most of the time when it's just them, they get on just fine. Correllation? I think so.

I don't even know why I bother coming home anymore. There isn't much point, as grandma's at the U of A hospital anyway, and I really don't like coming home. Besides, this isn't home anyway. Just a place where I used to live. I want to go home.

Happy Post 401. Because I missed 400.

Perhaps a few days doesn't seem like a break from posting, but it is for me. I have my emotions under control again and continue on in true Mare fashion: like nothing is wrong.

Personally, I think my family would be oh-so-proud of me. Like a true Weller, I shoved my emotions back down into a little bottle and stuffed that bottle in a trunk and tucked it away in the corner. That is what my family does when something is wrong or they're hurting from something; shove it away until it's well-hidden. And you know, I prefer it that way. It hurts less when you pretend it's not there. Yes, I still tear up a little sometimes, but the trick is to not think about it. My grandma is already planning Christmas. From her hospital bed. Despite the fact that she'll proabably either be too weak from chemo to do anything, or dying. The plan is for us women to be in the kitchen cooking and preparing everything, decorating and such, and grandma will supervise. (Yes, we're a rather old-fashioned, women in the kitchen, men on the couch enjoying themselves family.) However, if that's what makes her happy. At least it's something to live for.

Anywho. I've nothing interesting to tell you.

There's no crying in baseball.

Sometimes, Hope Just Isn't Enough.

Mum phoned today when I was pretty much completely unclothed as I was going to go for a shower, so I had to throw my clothes back on and go down to the payphone. The payphone that I normally use is out of service, and the phone I like to use was already in use, so I had to use one of the phones in main lister, by the doors to Kelsey and Mack. And I didn't have my keys, so I locked myself out, basically.

So, the gist of the conversation was the surgeon has to remove half of my grandma's pancrease with the tumour and it's cancerous, but we don't know how much it has infected the pancrease already. But basically, she's dying. And there isn't anything I can do about it.

I probably won't feel like posting for awhile, but I'm sure you'll understand.

Sometimes, hope just isn't enough.

Call Maintenance

Right, so today was fairly uneventful (homework, laundry) until I went to visit my grandma in the hospital. She's getting so weak, and so tired. She's lost over 20 pounds in a month. And now she's losing her spirit. Apparently, there isn't anything wrong with her spleen, it's her pancrease. It has a tumor. And they don't know if it's cancerous yet. But if it is, she'll die. And I don't know if I can handle that. And I don't want to talk about this anymore, because I can't cry here. Not in front of my parents. I just...can't. Just Mark and Rabe. They've seen me at my worst already lol.

Other than that, my day has been relatively normal. Lack of homework, but always is on Saturdays. *sigh* I can't wait to get home (home being Lister, of course). I miss my room and my floor and my rabe and my mark. It's just not the same here.

SO over high school

So last night was awards night. Woot. What a complete waste of time. Seriously, if I didn't need to get my yearbook, I wouldn't have gone. Mrs Collins drove us in, and as soon as I stepped into SAL, all I could think was "Ew. BUUHHHHHH. EWWW." Oh yes, I am over high school. To the point where I would really just rather not step foot in the place. Seriously guys, I know you think I'm being dramatic, but I really hate the place. Cool to the min. Anywho, we were there, we got our awards (I'm sorry, but I didn't get honors XII, they were just handing them out like candy), and booked it out of there. Oh pardon me, we stopped so Mark could have a chat with Iris Evan. Buuuhhhh. What a hoe. lol. Sorry, I've ranted at length about her hoe-ness, so I shan't here. "You're such a bright boy...I can tell, you'll go far....you'll have lots of obstacles, but I know you can overcome them..." Buuhhh. Iris Evans, you're a creeper. And she needs me guys. Iris Evans needs me. Because I'm in economics. Creeper. Creepa.

Anywho, Rabe got back in time for dodgeball, and I went and watched OC with Mark in 9H common room, then over to his to read Henry IV. Which did not, in fact, happen. Due to our lack of sleep, both of us managed to fall asleep. And I accomplished nothing but setting the alarms when I heard CJ come in because I was too damn lazy and tired to go back to my own room. And, let's face it, I really prefer not to sleep alone. I know, I'm a wuss, but I can't helpt it.

Anyway, this morning the first alarm goes off at 7, which is all good. I get up, turn off the alarm, push the button so the second alarm is on and go brush my teeth and wash off my make-up from the night before. So far, so good. I crawled back into bed (really, I had to be up for 8, who wants to get up early?), and fell back asleep. And woke up at 830. Because the alarm didn't go off. And I had class in TL basment at 9. OH CRAP. Actually, I believe I said "Oh shit, Mark wake up! It's 830 and we have class at 9!" "I'm awake. What are you doing here?" lol. OH BURN!

Boy, did I book it out of there. And was properly laughed at in the elevator by Brede, Tiffany, and two other people that I don't really remember. Everything was still hazy. I literally ran down the hallway to Henday and managed to catch Rabe coming out of our wing. I just grabbed my books, a sweater (I was wearing my tank top and pants from the day before...buuhhhh I hate sleeping in my clothes), and my coat and we made it to TL like, 5 min early. Oh, Mare you RULE!

Anyway, that was my excitement for the day. Have a quote: "In real life, unlike in Shakespeare, the sweetness of the rose depends upon the name it bears. Things are not only what they are. They are, in very important respects, what they seem to be. " ~ Hubert H. Humphrey

Oh Mare...

I'm, once again, cheating. But you know what, I've had 4 and a half hours of sleep, so if it bothers you, you can just...go over there! That's right, I said it! OH BURN!

I was called "doll" and "babe" today, within two mintues of each other. It was just a little creepy. Okay, yes it was Matteo (guy from spanish), but still. I don't particularly like being called "doll" and "babe" by people I don't really know all that well. It's just...creepy. But whatcha gonna do?

I don't know about this going to Rachel's math class. It means I have 5 classes mon/wed, and 4 fri. Seriously, by the end of english, I'm completely and utterly bushed. Muy consada. But I guess it's helping, so I shall continue to soldier on.

Speaking of english, I'm pretty sure I bombed that in-class essay. But you know what? I couldn't give a flying fuck. I'm just too tired. This is way too IB for me. I need more sleep. Fricken choir and awards night messing with my procrastinating.

I'm going home friday night. Poor Rabe shall be oh so lonely.

Another boring day.

Well, what can I say? I've become a fairly infrequent poster. I'd like to say that this is because I have a life, but then I'd be lying. Because I don't have a life. And it's not like I'm too busy doing homework either. I'm just too damn lazy. That's right, I'd rather be lying on a couch out in the lounge with my floor or watching a film on Mark's than thinking up boring posts for you guys to read. But really, it's not like you're waiting with baited breath for my posts anyways. Be still your beating hearts.

I think my Spanish mid-term went well today. It seemed really easy, so hopefully I didn't do too badly. I was talking to Richelle and Ashley after class and they both said it was easy, so I'm going to go with the universal opinion of "it was easy". Sound good? I thought so.

I hate Halloween. Why must you people tempt me with chocolates? WHY?! You know I have no will-power and cannot resist chocolate-peanut buttery goodness. It's quite unfair. How am I supposed to fit into my grad dress for Floormal? Seriously, if I can't fit into it, there will be Hell to pay. A lot.

Mare out.

PS, read the last personal in the Gateway, it's hilarious!